Episode Transcript
[00:00:00] Speaker A: This show is not a substitute for professional counseling and no relationship is created between the show host or guests and any listener. If you feel you are in need of professional mental health and are a UA student, we encourage you to contact the UA Counseling center at 348-3863. If you are not a UA student, please contact your respective counties crisis service hotline or their local mental health agency or insurance company. If it is an emergency situation, please call 911 or go to your nearest emergency room.
[00:00:42] Speaker B: What's up, guys? We're back. This is the Bama Balance. Real stories about college men's mental health.
[00:00:47] Speaker C: How's it been for the past week for you guys?
[00:00:50] Speaker D: It's been. Been good.
[00:00:52] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:00:52] Speaker D: Getting settled in, getting that groove, that class schedule, all the fun stuff that's not fun at first.
[00:01:01] Speaker C: Are classes looking good for the semester so far?
[00:01:03] Speaker B: I think so. I've got a pretty tough lineup, but hopefully we'll be able to conquer it.
[00:01:08] Speaker C: How does that happen? As a senior, I thought senior year is supposed to be the less difficult.
[00:01:12] Speaker B: Year, so I did, too. But I put myself in an awful situation. I was. Yeah, because you're right. Yeah. I was pre dental.
[00:01:19] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:01:20] Speaker B: But I switched over to accounting. So now I've got a lot in.
[00:01:24] Speaker C: My ballpark this year. Okay.
[00:01:26] Speaker B: This first semester is gonna be pretty tough. Next semester will be a little bit lighter.
[00:01:31] Speaker C: That'll be okay. That'll be the semester. You know, I've always found it funny. Not funny, but I've always found it really kind of entertaining that I'm walking around campus and seeing new students and new faces and for some reason, I don't know about the two of you, but I can tell who the new students are.
[00:01:54] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:01:54] Speaker C: Can you tell the same thing sometimes?
[00:01:57] Speaker D: Yeah. It can be pretty.
Not obvious, but, like, you can tell they look like they don't necessarily know where they're going or what they're doing. Especially when they got Google Maps out when they're walking to class. Like, I did the same thing when I was here, but, like, really, you know, small things like that, it's like, yeah, you're definitely new, trying to find.
[00:02:15] Speaker C: Your way around campus. You do the same thing, Brooks.
[00:02:18] Speaker B: Oh, yeah, no doubt. Especially on the quad. Like when you've got one of those classes in the inner kind of bin because all those halls are stacked on top of each other. So unless you go from hall to hall looking at signs, but.
[00:02:30] Speaker C: Right.
[00:02:31] Speaker B: I'm not the greatest about giving my time myself. A lot of time to get from class to class. So I've got to be on it and know where I'm going.
[00:02:39] Speaker C: Got to have the route laid out and, and all that.
I wonder if, you know, what it would be like, you know, being a freshman again, you know, now that you know what, you know, would it be, you know, would you handle that first day differently or what would change for you?
[00:02:59] Speaker B: I think I could, I wouldn't have to use Google Maps. I could know my way around, you know, your way around and I'd know what to expect, you know, what it looks like when a ton of people are in class change, that sort of thing. So I think it'd definitely be different just purely for the fact of you have the knowledge of what happens day to day.
[00:03:18] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:03:18] Speaker D: More comfortable with your surroundings kind of thing.
[00:03:21] Speaker C: That's right. I think our, I think our new students, freshmen are, are great. What I love about them is that, you know, they start at the university and, and I remember this just being again last century, being a freshman, being very wide eyed, you know, you kind of look at things around campus because they're all new. And so I think, I think that's certainly one of the things I value about our freshmen and our new students coming to campus. And one of those challenges can be, you know, how do you, as a freshman, as a new student, how do you start to find your own course, find your own way in life?
[00:04:00] Speaker B: Right.
So me and Dr. Perez last year co piloted the GRIT program and that was basically a just like almost inspiration from older guys that could talk to newer guys in the fraternity and basically just give them a sense of mind on what needs to be done and what we think could help them and the best way possible. And me and Dr. Prez were talking and the thing that stuck out most about this program to us was a part that we had about the North Star basically.
And this is just incredible because it brought up so much conversation and well being for those freshmen. And in the book this is the definition we had for the North Star. And it was a guiding principle that serves as a constant source of direction and inspiration in one's life. It is your sense of purpose and reminder of your guiding, of what your guiding principles are for your life. And we thought that was very important, brought up a lot of conversation and would be a great thing to talk about on here.
[00:05:02] Speaker C: Yeah, I think it'd be a lot of fun to, you know, for this episode to kind of focus in on, on those principles of defining your true north, your North Star. Something we touched on in an episode during the first season and something I'm looking forward to touching on again as well.
[00:05:22] Speaker B: This is the Batman Pallets. We'll be back after.
[00:05:41] Speaker D: Wvuafm Tuscaloosa.
[00:05:44] Speaker A: This show is not a substitute for professional counseling and no relationship is created between the show host or guests and any listener. If you feel you are in need of professional mental health and are a UA student, we encourage you to contact the UA Counseling center at 348386.
If you are not a UA student, please contact your respective counties crisis service hotline or their local mental health agency or insurance company. If it is an emergency situation, please call 911 or go to your nearest emergency room.
[00:06:25] Speaker D: Welcome back to the Bama Balance Podcast. This is Edward and we're just gonna continue to dive into that. What Brooks was talking about, like finding your true north, finding that North Star and your purpose on campus and trying to figure out, you know, what it is that is unique to you and what it is that where it is you want to be and where you want to go and just kind of finding that North Star because it looks different for everyone, it's not going to be the same as one person or the other. So just trying to figure out where you belong on campus.
[00:07:00] Speaker C: Right. I think that, you know, it's such an important concept and probably one that not a lot of students grasp initially. I know that it was something that was important for me when I was a student and again in the, when we were doing the GRIT program, Brooks, you and I, last year, it was something that James Sadowski and I, the art grad student at the time, we were trying to lay out a different format and felt like we needed to make it more engaging. And so one of the things we wanted to do is engage students on how they find their purpose, their true north, their North Star.
Looking back at it, we used some three, three guiding questions which I thought to me, I still go back to when I feel a bit off course in my own life and something I go back to every now and then. And I think it's, I think it's important to, to have that sense of purpose as a, you know, particularly as a freshman. I don't know how you all felt, how you felt as, as a freshman or, or even now.
Having that sense of wondering about your purpose or having a defined sense of purpose. Is that something you, like, think about or is that something that you've sort of pondered over?
[00:08:22] Speaker B: After we talked about it last year, you know, I had to switch majors and all that, so that really made me reevaluate everything.
As a freshman, I wish I would have had this conversation, um, which I had a great plan for myself, I felt like. But I mean, it's just truly not. Wouldn't have made me happy in the way that I'm happy with my decision now. So I feel like now I have a better grasp on it than my freshman year. But, you know, I mean, changes happen. And that's the beauty about this subject, is this is a way to get through life, not just school.
[00:08:59] Speaker C: That's right. That's exactly right. How about for you?
[00:09:03] Speaker D: I think it. I mean, it's pretty much having that direction is so important, I feel.
And I think it's easy to.
And I know I talked about last time, you know, it's like, try everything. And I still wouldn't say to do that. But at the same time, I. Sometimes I have to, like, remember, you know, you can't do everything, at least not at the same time. So be where you want to be, Find that area and have these conversations with yourself and figure out the people you want to be around, like the organizations you want to be a part of. And having that direction more so in the sense of your future, but also. Well, I guess like your future, but whether that's like years down the line or also a week from now, you know, it can look. It just looks different.
[00:10:00] Speaker C: But it's all important. Yeah, you can expect it to look different.
[00:10:02] Speaker D: Exactly.
[00:10:03] Speaker C: Right.
[00:10:04] Speaker D: Yeah. Sorry, you go ahead.
[00:10:05] Speaker C: No, I was going to say, I think that in trying to define your purpose to find your true north, one of the things that we did as part of the GRIT program, and certainly one of the things that I did in my initial exploration in college was to to focus on three questions that that one of my professors posed to us as a class, as undergrads. And I thought would be great to kind of walk through those questions, kind of like our own guided journey again. Either redefining our true north, rediscovering it, or affirming it kind of thing.
[00:10:39] Speaker B: No doubt.
[00:10:39] Speaker C: And there are so three questions.
And so the first one of those questions is, what are you good at? What are the things that you feel that you're good at? They can be things related to, you know, school related things athletic or hobbies. But what are the things you feel you're good at?
[00:11:01] Speaker B: See, as a freshman, I would tell you totally different things.
[00:11:04] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:11:05] Speaker B: Than I would now.
You know, I would have liked to say when I was younger, I was athletic and that sort of thing. When I've gotten to College, like, that's just not what we're looking for anymore. I mean, I'm not. I'm not strapping up the pads with the football team.
But you could.
[00:11:21] Speaker C: Well, you could.
[00:11:21] Speaker B: I don't know.
I'm not. I'm not a very big guy, Dr. Perez.
[00:11:25] Speaker C: Hey, but, you know, I don't.
[00:11:27] Speaker B: Don't take a lot of heart.
[00:11:29] Speaker C: Yeah, well, you got a lot of that.
[00:11:31] Speaker B: But, yeah, I mean. And I just witnessed one walking in the rose I was telling you all about. Oh, yeah, yeah. So happy. I had a young man walk up to me, and we're sitting at a stoplight, and he shakes my hand, tells me his name, and I tell him my name, and he's like, are you a freshman? And I was like, well, actually, I'm a senior.
He proceeded to say, well, wow, you're the first freshman or non freshman that I've met today. I was just thinking to myself, like, dag, if I could go back and be a freshman and do what that guy was doing, just because he's going to get to meet so many people. And that's just one of those things that if you're good at.
[00:12:09] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:12:09] Speaker B: Run with it. And that. That. That would be me now that I'd look back on it. I should have talked to as many as I can. Right. You know, it's different for everybody.
[00:12:16] Speaker C: What do you feel like you're good at now?
[00:12:19] Speaker B: Definitely making friends, talking.
I'd like to say I'm pretty organized, so I pride myself in that. Sometimes it can get a little. A little different.
[00:12:32] Speaker C: Levels of organization.
[00:12:33] Speaker B: Right? Organization, talking, and just hopefully never meeting a stranger.
[00:12:39] Speaker C: Oh, that's good.
Good. How about for you, Edward?
[00:12:43] Speaker D: I think I would also say my skill set looks very, very different than it did. Fresh. At least what I thought it looked freshman year is very different than now. But I'm going to think I'm. I think I'm a people person. I enjoy. I enjoy conversation. I enjoy intentionality, whatever that looks like with different people.
I.
I think I find myself drawn to different things, more so about who I can meet rather than what I'm going to do.
So maybe that means I either want to get better at some of the more, you know, social things, or maybe it means I just. I enjoy it because it's something that comes more natural. But I would say those two things. I'm definitely not organized.
I think I'll probably say the opposite. I'll say I'm flexible. Oh, that's a good way to be. I was gonna say, yes, Maybe could use a lot of work or not maybe. I definite could use a lot of organization in my life. But I do think I'm. I'm. I can adapt to different things pretty well.
[00:13:42] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:13:43] Speaker D: Again, that comes with some downside. Usually means I'm not concrete in some. Some ways. But I think I can. I can adapt. I can kind of be who I need to be right wherever I am.
[00:13:54] Speaker C: Right. You know, it's interesting because the question is, what are you good at? Not what can you do better?
[00:14:01] Speaker B: Right.
[00:14:01] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:14:03] Speaker C: So if you think about what it is that you're good at.
So, for example, I, you know, one of the things.
Some of the things I would say is I'm good at. I like to think I'm good at communicating. I like to think I'm good at connecting with people.
I like to think that I can also be flexible and organized when needed.
And there are times when, yeah, you know, it's just not worth the effort. And they're more important things.
I enjoy people. I enjoy.
I enjoy curiosity. I enjoy being curious.
I think that's. That's the other thing. But, but, you know, some of the things is that you were talking about, you also were talking about things you could do better at, but you really. The question is, what is it that you're good at? We can always improve at things. But you know, what. You know, what do you. What are you good at? What do you take pride in? And I think that's. I think that's a good way to start thinking about how that fits into your sense of purpose, I think.
[00:15:07] Speaker D: Yeah.
[00:15:08] Speaker C: Yeah. How would it have changed as a. As a senior? Did you say that, Brooke? Did you say how your things that you're good at have changed as a senior?
[00:15:16] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:15:16] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:15:17] Speaker B: Basically.
[00:15:18] Speaker C: Okay.
[00:15:19] Speaker B: But if I could go back and change, that's where I said I'd definitely just try to meet as many people as I possibly could.
[00:15:26] Speaker C: Good. Good. And how about you, Brooks? Oh, you know, Edward. Sorry.
[00:15:30] Speaker D: I would say I just am more aware of what it is that I can do. Not necessarily that, like, I'm better at different things. I'm just like, I know.
I know what I am. I know better what I'm better at.
I think just having spent time here and going through life now, this is my third year here, it's just kind of, you know, I better understand who I am and what I'm able to do as opposed to when I came in and I had so many different ideas of what I could be. I not know really who I am.
[00:16:01] Speaker C: I think you tapped on the key there, being able to now look back and get and have perspective on the things that you are good at and other things that you can be good at and do better in. Yeah.
[00:16:16] Speaker D: Well, thank you for listening. This has been the BAMA Balance. We'll be right back after this short break.
Wvuafm, Tuscaloosa.
[00:16:42] Speaker A: This show is not a substitute for professional counseling and no relationship is created between the show host or guests and any listeners. If you feel you are in need of professional mental health and are a UA student, we encourage you to contact the UA Counseling center at 348-3863. If you are not a UA student, please contact your respective counties crisis service hotline or their local mental health agency or insurance company. If it is an emergency situation, please call 911 or go to your nearest emergency.
[00:17:17] Speaker C: Foreign welcome back, everybody. This is Tony Perez and we've started this conversation and this guided journey on finding your true north.
The last, the last segment we asked ourselves the question, what are you good at? And again during break we continued to talk about this question and, and noted that while some folks may talk about things like their hard skills, like I'm good at woodwork or I'm good at, I'm good at athletics, something like that, some of those other things that, that individuals might be good at are some of the softer skills, like connecting with others, like developing relationships. And, and I think it's really important to, to define all of those things. It's kind of not one or the other, but all of those, all of those skills, all of those behaviors or traits. And, and it's just the beginning of exploring your true north. And so the second question that, that, that, you know, guides us on our journey to finding our true north is what brings you joy? And that. And that, and the answers to that question may or may not be related to the first question, but, but what is it that brings you joy? So, Edward, I'll go with you first.
[00:18:49] Speaker D: I mean, I think it probably echoes what I would like, probably some of the answers of the last question in terms of the fact that I just, I like being around people. I think a lot of my joy comes from being with, being with friends, like shared time, shared experience together.
I would also say football, Alabama football brings me joy that I will always.
Well, it brings me joy or it brings me a lot of sadness, but usually joy, hopefully. So things like that, I think having something to root for, having people to be around, maybe even a good meal, you know, just simple things like that I.
It doesn't take a lot.
[00:19:34] Speaker C: How about for you, Brooks?
[00:19:36] Speaker B: Food was a great yesterday. I love how you do that in there. Right after Dr. Prez has talked about Guthrie. I mean, now I'm hungry. I kind of want to go there.
But I mean, like Edward said, being around people, friends especially, you know, those are people that you can get around and forget what's going on at that time when you may need to take your head off stuff.
[00:19:58] Speaker C: Yes.
[00:19:59] Speaker B: Also, I'm a huge family guy, so I love that.
And I mean, sports, like you said, Alabama football makes me happy. Basketball makes me happy. But also I believe it's good to have time to yourself sometimes. And I enjoy that. You know, just like whether that's laying on my couch and watching a movie or doing something on my own. But pretty similar answers. But I throw. I'd probably throw some alone time in there just because I think that's good for you and sit back and think about some stuff.
[00:20:31] Speaker C: Right. And that alone time is different than being lonely, isn't it?
[00:20:34] Speaker B: Right.
[00:20:35] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:20:35] Speaker B: I mean, you know, and that's a massive point.
Like, if I was ever, like, lonely, that's be. That'd be the point where I wanted friends, if I wanted some, like a long time, you know, I'm all for going to watch a movie in silence.
[00:20:51] Speaker C: Right.
[00:20:51] Speaker B: And dark.
[00:20:52] Speaker C: Right.
[00:20:55] Speaker B: So I think that was a very.
[00:20:56] Speaker C: Important thing that you just brought up.
I think for me, too. So some of the things that bring me joy are a lot of what you guys have talked about already, you know, you know, being here on campus, Alabama football and basketball, sports of all kinds here at the university. And. And in some way, it's about the sport itself. It's about winning and. But also it's about being a part of something bigger than yourself or being a part of this community that comes together in the fall, every Saturday, every home game, and being a part of that. And you're part of that community.
So that brings me to being a part of that larger community, having alone time. I'm glad you raised that to Brooks. I think it is different than being alone, because as much as I enjoy that connection and connecting with folks, it's also good for me to have time, just alone, to, like, quiet time, when I can dedicate that to just thinking or not thinking or just zoning out, but something that, in a funny way recoups my energy, that kind of thing.
And as you guys were talking about what brings you joy, one of the things that I was reminded about and you reminded me of, it just A minute ago, Brooks, when you said family is the. The joy of family.
Right. And I haven't told you guys this, but last weekend I was out of town, and my oldest nephew was married about a year ago, and he and his wife just had their first baby. So.
[00:22:47] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:22:47] Speaker C: So I went to visit her. I'll visit them in Atlanta. Visit her. And sort of holding her kind of just reinvigorated that sense of family and a sense of kind of joy and connection you have with family.
Realizing that I'm much older than her. She was a month old at that time, but much older than her, but realizing that there's nothing more simple, but. And satisfying is having that connection with family and.
And holding that connection right there. It's kind of cool.
[00:23:23] Speaker B: That's crazy.
[00:23:23] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:23:23] Speaker B: If you actually think about it like that life was just brought into the world.
[00:23:27] Speaker C: That's right.
[00:23:27] Speaker B: Absurd.
[00:23:28] Speaker C: Oh, my gosh.
[00:23:29] Speaker B: It's got to be a crazy feeling.
[00:23:30] Speaker C: So surreal. So surreal. So at this point. Gosh, at this point. I guess so. I'm already an uncle. Does that. Was that a. Is that grand uncle, then? Is that great uncle?
Great uncle.
[00:23:43] Speaker B: It was your nephew.
[00:23:44] Speaker C: Yes. Oh, great uncle.
[00:23:45] Speaker B: Grunkle.
[00:23:46] Speaker C: Grunkle.
[00:23:47] Speaker B: Grunkle Perez.
[00:23:51] Speaker C: I'll have to have a hoodie made with that.
[00:23:53] Speaker B: No doubt.
[00:23:53] Speaker C: Grunkle. She can call me Grunkle.
[00:23:55] Speaker B: Yeah.
[00:23:56] Speaker C: But stuff like that, you know, it's. It's.
It's amazing how sometimes that question, what brings you joy? Can be.
Can be a tough one. But also it's a good reminder, I think, at least for me, about being able to take stock in the things I enjoy and the things that make me happy. Yeah, right.
[00:24:18] Speaker D: I think it's also when you talk a little bit about, you know, alone time, I think that kind of puts something, like, when I think about, like, what brings you joy, it kind of. What am I trying to say? Like, giving something, like giving you. Giving yourself, like, energy, giving yourself leeway and doing what you enjoy. Like, I think it's hard to do a ton of things if you're not particularly into those things.
[00:24:49] Speaker C: That's right.
[00:24:49] Speaker D: Like, that's right. What brings you joy?
[00:24:50] Speaker C: That's right.
[00:24:51] Speaker D: Like, that's where you need to be.
[00:24:53] Speaker C: Right.
[00:24:53] Speaker D: That's where you want to try to spend your time. And I think when it comes to, like, finding your true north, like, obviously you might not always enjoy homework, but, like, that's different. Like, there's obviously responsibilities you have to do, but at the same time, you don't want to bog yourself down with only A checklist. You want to go out there and.
And just enjoy your time while you have it. While you have this, this. Especially freshman year.
[00:25:20] Speaker C: Like. That's right.
[00:25:20] Speaker D: It's absolutely so different than sophomore year. At least it was for me. And I'm. I'm sure that's how. I mean, I'm sure it's how it is for everyone.
[00:25:28] Speaker B: When you get to our age, you have to start thinking about life.
[00:25:32] Speaker D: Life, Life. The future.
[00:25:33] Speaker B: When you're young, be young.
[00:25:35] Speaker D: Exactly.
[00:25:36] Speaker B: Push it off until you can.
Don't push it off all the way.
[00:25:41] Speaker D: In at some point.
[00:25:43] Speaker B: And yeah, that's even with like your, with your job in the future.
My dad always told me, find something that you love doing and it'll be worth doing.
So I mean.
[00:25:55] Speaker C: That's right.
[00:25:56] Speaker B: I love, love where you're at and that'll make life a lot more simple.
[00:26:00] Speaker C: Well, I know as an, as an undergraduate I certainly didn't have as much awareness, but. But shifting the way I shifted career wise and leading to me where I am now, I don't know that I would have anticipated or. Or predicted. But what I did learn to do is sort of trust in that process for me of defining my true north and following those things that were important for me, knowing what I enjoyed doing right and knowing the things that brought me joy, I think were two of the most important questions that, that helped me define my role and career and kind of personal life too.
Otherwise I might just be walking circles still in life, feeling a sense of uncertainty and confusion. You know.
The last question is something we'll focus on in our closing segment. But I think the beauty of these three questions. What are you good at? What brings you joy? And then our last question really come together to help you define your purpose in life.
What gives your life meaning? And what defines your true north? And so.
And so with that, I'm looking forward to exploring with the three of us this last question in the last segment. But for now we'll take a break and we'll be right back. This is the BAMA Battle.
[00:27:55] Speaker D: Wvuafm Tuscaloosa.
[00:27:58] Speaker A: This show is not a substitute for professional counseling and no relationship is created between the show host or guests and any listener. If you feel you are in need of professional mental health and are a UA student, we encourage you to contact the UA Counseling center at 348-3863. If you are not a UA student, please contact your respective counties crisis service hotline or their local mental health agency or insurance company. If it is an emergency situation please call 911 or go to your nearest emergency room.
[00:28:40] Speaker B: What's up, guys? We're back at BAM Balance.
And as Dr. Perez was just mentioning last at the beginning of last segment, the third question is what I think the most important question is undoubtedly. And that is, what does the world need for you right now?
[00:28:56] Speaker C: And.
[00:28:56] Speaker B: And this looks different for so many different people at so many ages of life.
I know when I was a freshman, my answer would be different than now. I know when I'm going to be graduated. My answer is going to be different from now.
But I am interested to hear what yalls are and I can go ahead and tell you all mine. I think world needs for me to be a good son, both to my parents and the Lord, be a good family member, good grandson, good cousin, be a good boyfriend, and be a good just friend in general.
I think those are four of the most important things that I could be to make my life better and just make me happier in general.
[00:29:38] Speaker C: So I don't know that I can go wrong or you can go wrong with any of those items, really. I. I know for me. So it's interesting what you said, Brooks, is that, you know, the question is, what does the world need from you right now? And so it can differ. Right. Depending on right where you are in your life. And, you know, part of what I think the world needs for me right now, if I think about my circumstance right now, is to continue doing what I'm doing here at the university, you know, being the best.
I don't want to say administrator, but really, it's really at the heart of it, it's being the best person that I can be in working with students and helping to empower students to be their best selves.
I think there's also a sense of being called because that question also raises for me, you know, what you're calling right now. Right, Right.
So I think part of it for me is being called to make sure that, you know, there's as much as possible, that there's fairness, that there's kindness right in and sort of all interactions or ways that I can help continue or build kindness and understanding. I think that those two things are kind of at the heart of any relationship. Right. Kindness, honesty and trust.
So if I can help continue and instill and help others develop that, it feels like that's kind of what the world needs from me right now because I've learned so much of that from others and in other relationships in my life. Sort of passing it on. Right?
[00:31:53] Speaker B: No doubt.
[00:31:53] Speaker C: Yeah.
[00:31:54] Speaker D: I think for me, I would say. I would probably also say, like, being a good brother, being a good son.
I think family is so important. Especially, like, I got one member of my family moving, right? Like, in the process of moving, figuring out what she wants to do.
So just kind of being there, being.
And I think this. This probably goes beyond family, but just trying to be a good servant and understanding that, you know, I have a lot of time at this point in my life which allows me to maybe help others where they need it and meet people where they're at. So I think just trying to be that for people. Also a good small group leader. I think as I dive into leadership at my church, like, wanting to be the best I can be for them, just those things. And also maybe, you know, getting loud in Brian Diddy Stadium, maybe that's what the world needs from me right now.
[00:32:53] Speaker C: Hey, let me tell you, that's what Bama Nation needs from you.
[00:32:56] Speaker D: That's so.
[00:32:57] Speaker C: From all three of us, for hitting.
[00:32:59] Speaker D: All the different parts, I think that's probably one of them. But I mean, realistically, more so, the first couple ones, me, I would just say those things, just trying to be, you know, understand what I'm able. Like, the capacity I have right now to help others out and to give.
It won't always be this easy. So just trying to understand that.
[00:33:21] Speaker C: I was just going to ask, how easy is it to give what the world needs from us right now?
Like, individually, like, we also here. We all said, here's what the world needs from us. But how easy is it to give that?
[00:33:40] Speaker B: I feel like it's.
I mean, you're definitely gonna have to put your mind to it and tell yourself, like, you know, I. I want to be good for. For. For me, my family.
[00:33:51] Speaker C: Right.
[00:33:52] Speaker B: Friends, girlfriend, for y' all sitting here doing this podcast. So that's a common thing you're gonna have to remind yourself about. I'm not sure if it's necessarily hard, but it can get tough at times. I feel like, you know, you may go down a path one day where you've got the case of the Mondays, and we don't want to be sitting here right now doing this. Like, that's that time where you've got to kick it into gear and be like, hey, I want to be the best version of myself.
[00:34:19] Speaker C: Yes. Yes. What were you going to say, Edward? Were you.
[00:34:21] Speaker D: I. I would just echo that. Like, there are times where it's not going to be easy, but it's always. I mean, it's always a Matter of where your mind's at. Um, because you can always. I mean, you can choose to. To.
You can choose to, like, whatever you. Whatever, like, you're going through, you can choose to respond, like, however you want to. And I think that's just the important thing at the end of the day is how am I going to respond to this adversity?
And am I going to. You know, for me personally, I don't want to let anyone down. So when I look at what is needed for me right now, am I going to let something challenging keep me from trying to fulfill that need? I think that is just what it comes down to at the end of the day, of trying to remember, you know, what your responsibility is. And there are times where you do need a minute yourself. There are times where you got to kind of take a step back and say, all right, maybe just for this week, the world needs less from me. Maybe for this day or this. Maybe this season of my life, I can. I just need to give less. And that's perfectly fine. It's just understanding where you're at and what you're able to do and not. Not shying away from adversity or challenge, right?
[00:35:35] Speaker C: Kind of recognizing your limits. And, Brooks, I like what you said, too, because there's a real intentionality now to answering that question. What does the world need from me right now?
And there are some days when I can give more. There are some days where I may not be able to give as much, but also to, how is that.
How is that reaction? Or how is. How. How much of myself do I give to the world that's consistent with what brings me joy and the things that I'm good at? Because all those things now fit together to define our true north.
And, you know, when it. When it comes to what the world needs from me right now, it's something I probably ask myself every day, and I come up with a different answer every day. I think part of it is, you know, knowing that you have a good foundation and yourself and knowing what brings you joy and the things that you're good at, that you can be flexible and you can have more leeway or more insight, actually, more depth of knowledge, and answering that question about what does the world need for me right now? Because it might be that I have all the energy to. To give all of myself. There's some days where I may need to give more to myself, right. In order to keep consistent with things I'm good at, things that bring me joy.
[00:37:06] Speaker B: And I do think that when you do find your North Star, true north. It just makes life a lot more better.
[00:37:15] Speaker C: Flow. Yeah.
Yeah.
[00:37:17] Speaker B: You feel happy, not necessarily almost content. Obviously you want to go harder and. And do more, but, you know, you start to see some of that anxiety and depression, stuff like that slowly fade out.
[00:37:31] Speaker C: Right.
[00:37:31] Speaker B: Until you're at the point where you're doing what you love every day and doing it for a good reason.
[00:37:36] Speaker C: Right, right. It's. It's really interesting that.
That I think the more certain that we are of ourselves, the more certain we are of our true north and our purpose in life, the more we can rely on that, trust that, and the less anxious we can feel, the less insecure we might feel about our own lives and feel really that sense of not only fulfillment, but satisfaction as well in the way that we're living our life. And there are times when we'll. You can veer off course or a number of things that'll happen that can get us off course.
And I think that's why it's always important, at least for me to, you know, when I feel like I've drifted off 40 degrees right rudder or something like that, then that's why it's important for me to revisit those questions. And, you know, that's why I enjoy long hikes. Gives me that kind of alone time to reflect and think back on, you know, where am I with my true north, and how do I need to sort of drift back into and to focus and into my path.
Awesome.
[00:38:53] Speaker B: Well, we're going to wrap this episode up, guys, if y' all want to follow us on Instagram at the Bama Balance and stick around next week and be looking out for that video.
We have a special guest for y' all that we'll. We'll think y' all will find very interesting, and hopefully he'll give us some great insight on some different things.
But that's it for the Bama Balance, right? Real stories about men's college, men's mental health. I'm Brooks Barbary.
[00:39:18] Speaker D: I'm Edward felton.
[00:39:19] Speaker C: And I'm Dr. Tony Perez.
[00:39:21] Speaker B: Thank y'.
[00:39:21] Speaker C: All.
[00:39:38] Speaker D: WVUAFM Tuscaloosa.
[00:39:41] Speaker A: This show was not intended as a substitute for professional counseling. Further, the views, opinions, and conclusions expressed by the show hosts or their guests are their own and not necessarily those of the University of Alabama, its officers or trustees. Any views, opinions, or conclusions shared on the show do not create a relationship between the host or any guest and any listener. And such a relationship should never be inferred. If you feel you are in need of professional mental health and are a UA student, please contact the UA Counseling center at 348-3863. If you are not a UA student, please contact your respective counties crisis service hotline or their local mental health agency or insurance company. If it is an emergency situation, please call 911 or go to your nearest emergency room.
